Orville Baynerton is an author of Science Fiction / Fantasy / Alternate History novels, including the best-selling Dragons Of World War II series.

 

HOSTESS NEWS & HITLER’S DRAGONS UPDATES
I’m still very depressed about the Hostess bankruptcy… I’m hoping that some private equity firm will step up and resolve this before I have to start stocking up on Ding Dongs ® and Donettes ® like some kind of survivalist!
The BAD NEWS: It’s looking like Hitler’s Dragons & The Christmas Truce — disastrously postponed last year and now delayed until the 2012 Holiday season— may only be available as a paperback and digital eBook. This is devastating to me, as I think it would make a perfect Xmas gift in the small hardcover format. That’s the way I intended it to be. I’m going to fight for this one, so perhaps someone can start an online petition or something.
Also, the Hitler’s Dragons ReelzChannel TV miniseries is stuck in limbo. We cannot seem to agree on who should play Hitler, and now I’m getting pressure to somehow de-emphasize his role in the series. This is IMPOSSIBLE! The whole saga is about Hitler having dragons!
The GOOD NEWS: the paperback edition of Hitler’s Dragons & The League Of Nations is now in stores! I will be not be doing a full book tour for this edition, but stay tuned for information about a few appearances I will be making to read excerpts and sign autographs in the coming weeks… 
Please be sure to follow me on twitter @HitlersDragons for all my latest news & musings!

HOSTESS NEWS & HITLER’S DRAGONS UPDATES

I’m still very depressed about the Hostess bankruptcy… I’m hoping that some private equity firm will step up and resolve this before I have to start stocking up on Ding Dongs ® and Donettes ® like some kind of survivalist!

The BAD NEWS: It’s looking like Hitler’s Dragons & The Christmas Truce — disastrously postponed last year and now delayed until the 2012 Holiday season— may only be available as a paperback and digital eBook. This is devastating to me, as I think it would make a perfect Xmas gift in the small hardcover format. That’s the way I intended it to be. I’m going to fight for this one, so perhaps someone can start an online petition or something.

Also, the Hitler’s Dragons ReelzChannel TV miniseries is stuck in limbo. We cannot seem to agree on who should play Hitler, and now I’m getting pressure to somehow de-emphasize his role in the series. This is IMPOSSIBLE! The whole saga is about Hitler having dragons!

The GOOD NEWS: the paperback edition of Hitler’s Dragons & The League Of Nations is now in stores! I will be not be doing a full book tour for this edition, but stay tuned for information about a few appearances I will be making to read excerpts and sign autographs in the coming weeks… 

Please be sure to follow me on twitter @HitlersDragons for all my latest news & musings!

NEW BOOK!  Hitler’s Dragons & The Christmas Truce - in stores December 6!
Armed with foreknowledge of the widespread Christmas ceasefires on the Western Front, Hitler plans a horrifying surprise attack, but his Army of Magical Dragons, feeling the Holiday Spirit, have other ideas. Acclaimed author Orville Baynerton delivers a thought-provoking tale that is sure to become a New Seasonal Classic.  ($18.95, Trade Cloth)
My publisher asked me to have something ready for the Holidays, so I delivered this Xmas novella. Some fans are asking if this is “canon” and I’d say yes. This book takes place in between books 2 and 3 of the DOWW1 series, and will be slotted there in the chronology guide in the front of all future printings of the series. Is it essential for fans of the series to pick this up? Absolutely. I need people to buy this.
HITLER’S DRAGONS: THE MINISERIES UPDATE
I’m very frustrated by the slow progress of the ReelzChannel mini-series. We are stuck on the casting of Hitler. It’s so hard— we want him to be likeable, but he also has to be Hitler. Treading a very fine line. For a long time, it was looking like Charlie Schlatter (18 Again!, TV’s Ferris Bueller) was our man but for reasons unknown to myself it never happened. I have my opinions but now I’m being shut out of the casting process entirely. I’m pushing very hard for an actor who will remain unnamed (he played a certain key role on a show that rhymes with Snuffy The Sampire Slayer, and I think he’d be just dynamite, but apparently I don’t know what I’m talking about.)
It’s looking like we are pushed back to January 2013 for the premiere. It’s an exhausting process.
OTHER NEWS
Everyone knows I am a sucker for Point-Of-Sale retail displays, and when I chanced upon one of these for Bissinger’s Ghost Chili Apple Salt Caramels, I was a goner. I asked the lady cashier if I could buy the entire display, and before long I was sitting in my car in the parking lot of Bed, Bath & Beyond eating multiple 5pc packages, wishing that I had also bought a beverage. It wasn’t all the Ghost Chili Apple variety, either, they have a whole array of flavors, though GCA is by far my favorite. Oh brother, I have almost none left at home, I’m gonna have to order some online…

NEW BOOK!  Hitler’s Dragons & The Christmas Truce - in stores December 6!

Armed with foreknowledge of the widespread Christmas ceasefires on the Western Front, Hitler plans a horrifying surprise attack, but his Army of Magical Dragons, feeling the Holiday Spirit, have other ideas. Acclaimed author Orville Baynerton delivers a thought-provoking tale that is sure to become a New Seasonal Classic.  ($18.95, Trade Cloth)

My publisher asked me to have something ready for the Holidays, so I delivered this Xmas novella. Some fans are asking if this is “canon” and I’d say yes. This book takes place in between books 2 and 3 of the DOWW1 series, and will be slotted there in the chronology guide in the front of all future printings of the series. Is it essential for fans of the series to pick this up? Absolutely. I need people to buy this.

HITLER’S DRAGONS: THE MINISERIES UPDATE

I’m very frustrated by the slow progress of the ReelzChannel mini-series. We are stuck on the casting of Hitler. It’s so hard— we want him to be likeable, but he also has to be Hitler. Treading a very fine line. For a long time, it was looking like Charlie Schlatter (18 Again!, TV’s Ferris Bueller) was our man but for reasons unknown to myself it never happened. I have my opinions but now I’m being shut out of the casting process entirely. I’m pushing very hard for an actor who will remain unnamed (he played a certain key role on a show that rhymes with Snuffy The Sampire Slayer, and I think he’d be just dynamite, but apparently I don’t know what I’m talking about.)

It’s looking like we are pushed back to January 2013 for the premiere. It’s an exhausting process.

OTHER NEWS

Everyone knows I am a sucker for Point-Of-Sale retail displays, and when I chanced upon one of these for Bissinger’s Ghost Chili Apple Salt Caramels, I was a goner. I asked the lady cashier if I could buy the entire display, and before long I was sitting in my car in the parking lot of Bed, Bath & Beyond eating multiple 5pc packages, wishing that I had also bought a beverage. It wasn’t all the Ghost Chili Apple variety, either, they have a whole array of flavors, though GCA is by far my favorite. Oh brother, I have almost none left at home, I’m gonna have to order some online…

On my recent visit to NYC to promote my latest book, I picked up a number of snack items that I was previously unfamiliar with. Foremost among them would be Tastykakes, which I found at several Duane Reade stores in the New York Manhattan area.  
I didn’t actually open any of them until I arrived home, at which point I experienced a momentary panic upon A) enjoying them, B) visiting the Tastykakes website at www.tastykakes.com, and C) using the site’s excellent and easy-to-use “store finder” function, only to discover that the nearest store selling their products was 227 miles away, in Paducah, Kentucky!
The next sixty seconds were excruciating for me— I was angry, disappointed in myself for not buying more of them while I had the chance, dreading the long drives to Kentucky that I would have to undertake, repeatedly, in the coming months and years… Until I noticed a button at the top of the page which said two magical words: “Shop Online.”  
Thank you, Internet! Is there anything you CAN’T do?
I encourage everyone to visit the site before May 15th for 10% off if you use the promotional code LOVERS511. 
I recommend the “Large Classic Collection.”  (It is billed as their “most popular item.”) Here is a description from the site itself:
The Large Classic Collection is the quintessential Tastykake variety pack. It’s stuffed with our most popular cakes for the full Tastykake experience.

Collection includes:
2 Butterscotch Krimpets boxes (2 cakes/pkg, 6 pkgs/box)
2 Peanut Butter Kandy Kakes boxes (2 cakes/pkg, 6 pkgs/box)
1 Chocolate Junior box (1 cake/pkg, 4 pkgs/box)
1 Cream Filled Buttercream Cupcake box (2 cakes/pkg, 6 pkgs/box)
1 Chocolate Cupcake box (2 cakes/pkg, 6 pkgs/box)
I’ve already put in an order that will keep me well-stocked with Tastykake products for the next 4-8 weeks, depending on my mood and how well my book is selling.

On my recent visit to NYC to promote my latest book, I picked up a number of snack items that I was previously unfamiliar with. Foremost among them would be Tastykakes, which I found at several Duane Reade stores in the New York Manhattan area.  

I didn’t actually open any of them until I arrived home, at which point I experienced a momentary panic upon A) enjoying them, B) visiting the Tastykakes website at www.tastykakes.com, and C) using the site’s excellent and easy-to-use “store finder” function, only to discover that the nearest store selling their products was 227 miles away, in Paducah, Kentucky!

The next sixty seconds were excruciating for me— I was angry, disappointed in myself for not buying more of them while I had the chance, dreading the long drives to Kentucky that I would have to undertake, repeatedly, in the coming months and years… Until I noticed a button at the top of the page which said two magical words: “Shop Online.”  

Thank you, Internet! Is there anything you CAN’T do?

I encourage everyone to visit the site before May 15th for 10% off if you use the promotional code LOVERS511. 

I recommend the “Large Classic Collection.”  (It is billed as their “most popular item.”) Here is a description from the site itself:

The Large Classic Collection is the quintessential Tastykake variety pack. It’s stuffed with our most popular cakes for the full Tastykake experience.

Collection includes:

  • 2 Butterscotch Krimpets boxes (2 cakes/pkg, 6 pkgs/box)
  • 2 Peanut Butter Kandy Kakes boxes (2 cakes/pkg, 6 pkgs/box)
  • 1 Chocolate Junior box (1 cake/pkg, 4 pkgs/box)
  • 1 Cream Filled Buttercream Cupcake box (2 cakes/pkg, 6 pkgs/box)
  • 1 Chocolate Cupcake box (2 cakes/pkg, 6 pkgs/box)

I’ve already put in an order that will keep me well-stocked with Tastykake products for the next 4-8 weeks, depending on my mood and how well my book is selling.

I’m depressed…

Yesterday was a pretty rough day for me.  

It started out so well: on the way to a book signing at Borders, I stopped in to Dunkin’ Donuts and ordered a 32-oz Vanilla Bean Coolatta®, which was so delicious I ordered a second one to-go!  

That’s when my luck took a turn. I spilled my second Coolatta® all over myself AND the equipment I was bringing for the multimedia part of my presentation. Then, I arrived at the 32nd St. Borders only to find that it was now an empty building! Apparently they closed last month and my publicist hadn’t bothered to re-confirm with them after the initial booking was made at the beginning of the year. I saw a couple of twentysomethings dressed as Hitler hanging around out front, and naturally assumed that they were fans of mine, no doubt disappointed, as I was, that the event was not happening. I approached them, thinking I would give them a thrill, only to learn that they had not read my books and had never heard of me. Just two guys dressed up like Hitler, apparently commemorating his death in their own fashion.

That leads me to the next bad break of the day: the death of OBL, which is all anyone can talk about. I’m of course, as delighted as the next person about his passing, but this is going to mean a significant overhaul in the outline for my next series of books- my Dragons Of World War III series, which was to feature Hitler and his Dragons emerging from a portal to 2012 and teaming up with Bin Laden and his Al Qaeda forces to start a third World War. Just incredibly frustrating, I’ve put so much work into working out the precise plot points for a series of five books, only to have to essentially re-work the entire thing from start to finish. If I didn’t have this 32-oz. Vanilla Bean Coolatta® in my hand, I’d be one very unhappy man right now.

I have a few more days in NYC to sight-see and do some interviews, then it’s back to the calm and quiet of my ranch-style home in Brazito, Missouri, where I can get back to the real work.

So-called “historians” don’t respect my work!

Once again, so-called WWII “historican” Anthony Beevor has taken to trashing my work, calling my novels "non-serious", "lazy", and "rife with historical inaccuracies." Well, let me say something:  I tried reading a couple of his books, and I didn’t even finish them. If that’s lazy, then I guess you can call me “lazy.”  

Who does this guy think he is, anyway? He doesn’t “own” history, and I think he’s jealous because I get to have dragons in my books and he doesn’t. I make it a point never to care what negative things people say about my work, and this guy is no exception. Who cares what he says, anyway? No one, that’s who. Certainly not me.  

And they’re not “inaccuracies”, Antony— the discovery of the portals to the realm of the Magical Dragons had a widespread effect on the way history played out. And yes, that includes the way some things were spelled.

I don’t want this to escalate into some kind of “literary feud” because, for one thing, I don’t think non-fiction books count as “literature.” Anybody can just compile a bunch of facts and figures, so what?  

I’m gonna choose to rise above this and be the bigger man here. So, fuck you, Antony Beevor!

-OB

I purchased a 2.25oz bag ofGRANDMA’S® Vanilla Mini Sandwich Crème Cookies today, and I was not disappointed.  It has been some time since I had sampled these simple yet elegant snack cookies, and I was reminded that they are well worth the 75 cents.  (I have learned that in some areas of the country, they are 85 cents to a dollar!  Heavens!)
My one complaint:  why is there so much AIR in the bag?  When I buy a bag of cookies, it would be nice if it was a full bag.  We’ve grown accustomed to this kind of chicanery when it comes to snack CHIPS, but cookies?  Give me a break.  Don’t do this, cookie makers, we deserve better than this.
-OB

I purchased a 2.25oz bag ofGRANDMA’S® Vanilla Mini Sandwich Crème Cookies today, and I was not disappointed.  It has been some time since I had sampled these simple yet elegant snack cookies, and I was reminded that they are well worth the 75 cents.  (I have learned that in some areas of the country, they are 85 cents to a dollar!  Heavens!)

My one complaint:  why is there so much AIR in the bag?  When I buy a bag of cookies, it would be nice if it was a full bag.  We’ve grown accustomed to this kind of chicanery when it comes to snack CHIPS, but cookies?  Give me a break.  Don’t do this, cookie makers, we deserve better than this.

-OB